HAIR in GUATEMALA

Bald is no more. It is time for something new. I never have appreciated half measures. This should come as no surprise to those who know me, or even to those who have observed me from a safe distance.

I lived life as a bald man for 30 months. Overall it was quite the positive experience. I felt distinguished, I felt bold, I felt unique. Somehow it helped me face giants during a difficult time in life. I tip my hat to the bald. You rock.

This time in life calls for a new adventure in hair. Having experienced life as a bald man in society, now I embark on a mission to live life long. I was first inspired by this man… 

Cullen Bohannon, lead character on AME's Hell On Wheels.

"What you suppose the Lord's gonna think about a man like me?"

After all… he wears a hat and I love the grit and tenacity of his character. I love that he lives by his beliefs and he lives by them no matter how great the challenge. He inspires me.

Realistically, I will never have the wavy flowing mane which Mr. Bohannon frontiers through the west. Mine is very straight, unapologetically so. I have spent most of my life despising it's stubborn straightness. Now the time has come for me to embrace it.

It seems that long hair has been done well recently though. While I know my mug is a far cry from this gent, he does give me a path (and I also respect the sunglasses).

Besides, bald gets your head sunburned a lot. I live in Guatemala now. I figure it is natural sunblock.

It's gonna take a while. From the starting point of bald, I've been growing it since the beginning of September. Progress so far… about 1.5 inches (or 3mm).

Hair we go!

Juxtaposed

180 days into life as a missionary, this word is at the forefront of my concepts. As Google puts it, "Juxtapose: place or deal with close together for contrasting effect."

My life is an existence between overlapping plains of juxtaposition. We are surrounded by indescribable beauty, and incomprehensible poverty. National Geographic Traveler repeatedly lists Guatemala as one of the worlds most best destinations, and Happy Planet Index ranks Guatemala #10 on the World Happiness index, while Guatemala is in the top 5 of all nations in this hemisphere for suicide among young and expectant mothers. 

The grip of poverty seems inescapable. So many can not bear the thought of watching her baby starve and slowly die. It is common in the city to see a mother, holding her child… step off the El Incienso bridge in Guatemala city in a desperate act to end the suffering and sense of hopelessness.

We see powerful faith that rises above circumstance in defiance of unsurpassable odds. We see smiles and laughter and love that hold families together that have nothing. Dirt floors act as beds and concrete holding tanks act as drinking water, cleaning water, and communal baths. And there we find people willing to share the meager food they have with strangers.

We clothe students and see them thrive at schools that are supported by many of you in the States… and we are also keenly aware that children simply disappear, the victim of a trafficker or collateral taken against a debt unpaid. And these are the children that survive birth, with infant mortality rates at 25%.

We see beautiful smiles from faces that have little or no dental care. Lost teeth are an inconvenience when the reality is that people frequently die from tooth decay gone bad. Simple, curable disease… still claims easy victims.

The textiles here are incredibly beautiful and filled with meaning. Each region weaves with it's own colors and patterns, often investing months into a single textile. The skill level requires decades to learn and the girls begin as young as 6 or 7. But despite the high level of skill, the average wage here is unthinkable for many of us. 

$5 a day, for 12 hours of labor on a mountainside harvesting coffee seems to be very common. And yet food prices are just as expensive here as in the U.S., where college students complain about making $8.00 an hour to pour coffee.

Justaposed. Yes. And then there is the story of me. I am unqualified to do what I am doing. I am a pastor, a missionary, the founder of an orphanage, and beginning in January, the Administrative Coordinator of a school. My undergraduate degree was in psychology. I've managed retail for the last 13 years. I've had no formal language training. I have 3 kids, the youngest being just 2.

And yet… I find myself here. Here in this place of impossible contrast. Impossible beauty and impossible pain. It is the happiest place in the world, and also the darkest. It is here that I find my faith the strongest. Contrast is everywhere. I cannot miss the power of it.

Light stands out the sharpest among the darkness. It is here that I find myself Juxtaposed. 

And justified. 

One of my favorite TV shows. Compelled me to thinking…. 

"knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law but by faith in Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Christ Jesus, that we might be justified by faith in Christ and not by the works of the law; for by the works of the law no flesh shall be justified."  -Galations 2:16

"I think he had that surgery just so he could get the cane."

If you've ever watched HOUSE on the FOX network, then you are probably familiar with his sport jacket, t-shirt, torn jeans, and of course... his cane.

I have admired the way his character wears the cane without apology. And so, after having a surgical procedure on the bottom of my right foot... I figured, why not?

I hobbled my way out of the store and immediately met the eyes of my laughing and smiling wife. As I dragged my bum leg into the car, I heard her cough out between laughs, "well, of course you would."

As my life would have it, this Sunday involved an announcement at church regarding our mission in Guatemala.

I absolutely love these last few days as we near the horizon. I am consumed by the desire to get there and to begin taking steps into the summer. I somehow can feel the future in my hands. We began counting down the days last July... 300 days ago. 

My surgery finds me forced to sit still and unable to drive. The timing was perfect however for me to sell my car and so I concentrate on preparation via Skype, email, telephone, and Rosetta Stone. 

Our 2 vehicles await us, we are enrolled to begin with 4 weeks of language school in Antigua, we have an apartment rented there for that time, Caleb & Aleks are scheduled to go to Camp Guamiski (a camp for missionary kids), they are also enrolled in the Christian Academy where Kellie will volunteer, my role is becoming clearly defined, passports, plane tickets, and suitcases are secured and in position!

Standing where we are now and looking back across the landscape of these past few years is absolutely breathtaking. The path of our lives is simply the shaping of the hands of God. He gave us the vision... we began walking... and He has indeed moved mountains.

Since the spring of 2012 our family has travelled to China (adoption), Texas (training), Guatemala twice, lived in my parent's basement and at Kellie's parents upstairs. From here we will stay at Mimi's house for a few days, then move to Antigua for a month, move to the house next door to Mimi's House, and will stay there as we adjust to the culture of Guatemala.

This past year has been incredible. We know God has used these days to prepare us for the journey to come. I think we have learned to enjoy each step of the way. We have found joy and happiness in a lot of unexpected places.

Even in a busted foot and a fancy cane.

While I did not have foot surgery just so I "could get the cane," I certainly am not going to let the opportunity pass me by! Ha!

21 days to Guate! 

By then my excuse to use a cane will be gone, but still I will be working towards our calling, our passion, our dream...

opening our home to the lost and hurting of Guatemla.

So then, I won't be Dr. House, but I can be a pastor and missionary who lives in SHEPHERD HOUSE!

(and if I ever hurt my foot again... I have a kickin' cane just for the event)

GUATEMALA 2013: (4) MADMEN

A great deal of my time lately has been spent on creating posters, flyers, and mailers that get out the word on our mission in Guatemala and how others can help us fulfill our dream and calling of a Home for Abandoned Babies.

I realized that I can now add Advertising to my recently expanded resume' of evangelist, block-layer, carpenter, and fundraiser… but I was afraid that MADMAN (a spoof off of AMC's MADMEN about an advertising agency) might just send out the wrong vibe.

I thought this more fitting.

When I share with people about how we have sold our belongings and that we are moving to Central America with no salary or wage and that we will be dependent on the provision of God through the obedience of His people… they often are shocked by the concept.  

Our Initial Mailer: A refrigerator Magnet.

The other night I even found myself in the home of well-meaning people who were trying to convince me to sell energy on the Internet to my friends and relatives as a source of income. I was saddened by the gesture.

Our December Mailer: Pledges at 50%

There is room in our ministry for many to join us. Each person who offers up a prayer or sends to us a dollar is taking part in this great commission… this call to put faith to action. 

Our January Mailer: An overview of our Mission

Each and every one that walks with us does so in obedience to God and will receive blessings from Him in the form of His promises of peace & joy that come from the content of our souls rather than the context of our situations.

Announcing our Fundraising Concert Event

And so… here are a few of the signposts that I have set up along the way for those who are willing to have their eyes opened and their lives changed. I pray that they speak to you.

Our latest challenge was to develop a 5 minute presentation to quickly tell an audience: who we are, what we abandon, what we pursue, why we do it, and how you can join us.

We pour out our hearts to all we encounter. This is true religion.

This is our calling… each and every one of us is part of this greatest of stories.

To join our mission today:

www.cten.org/chadshepherd

GUATEMALA 2012: (35) Breaking Bad

Recently my imagination has been captured again by AMC. While our television watching has decreased dramatically over the past year, we have watched several AMC series' with rapt attention. Breaking Bad is a terrible story with terrible characters who make terrible choices. It truly is abysmal and with has no redeeming qualities. And yet... the characters seem real and their struggles resonate with the human condition and the struggles of life. We watch as the life of a man is shattered and something deep within his soul seems to snap. It reminds me of the scene I watched each Christmas as a kid of the Grinch's heart shrinking 2 times too small. 

Life does not always behave as we expect, and sometimes it can shatter us. I think belief plays a big role in how we handle the pressure. Mr. White broke bad when he found life meaningless. It leaves me to ask the question, how would things have turned out differently if his actions would have backed his belief? I find similarities between my life and the life of Walter White. We each encountered moments in our lives that broke us. I think it is reasonable to say that we all have had those moments. If you haven't so far... then the time will find you.

It is in these breaking moments that our character matters. The pressure of life begins to boil the content of our soul and we either cling to the promise of our convictions or we abandon what we know and seek solace in the flight. 

The problem with running is that you can't run forever. When you finally have to collapse... you are the same person with the same problems. But this is the good news. God loves broken people. He makes all things new. If you have been broken... it is time to discover your belief. It is your moment to begin coming back.

I was broken by the conditions of living that I encountered in Guatemala. I was broken by the poverty of my own belief and convicted by the lives of faith that I observed by the people who held their faith in the midst of devastation. I came home and my own problems seemed ridiculous, my stress seemed petty, my missteps and sins glared as selfish... I felt humiliated by my own world. 

What do you do when your world suddenly glares as false? You break. This is the power of the realization of true belief. A moment like Paul had on the road to Damascus when God slammed him blind in the dirt. A moment like Walt White had when the Dr. told him he had cancer. Each a moment when a man realized that what he had believed was suddenly stripped bare and empty in a moment. 

Has God ever found you in a scene like this? You know... when it seems like the world is crashing down around you and you are standing defenseless and in your underwear? Hopefully not literally! We all find ourselves broken. 

I think it is important to know that the brokenness is not the end. It is the steps we take after we break that make all the difference. Will we break bad... or we will begin backing belief with action?

As we take steps towards God, He is there to take our hand. God's story is His pursuit of us. His pursuit of me. His pursuit of you. 

Life for us... is amazing as we pursue living our belief and allow the love of God to guide our steps. Everything takes on powerful meaning when you do it because of the love of God. Fears dissolve. Barriers shatter. The impossible simply happens.

Kellie and I are missionaries because this is where we find ourselves being pursued by God. This is how our brokenness is being mended. God finds us all in different places. We simply need to listen for His voice and take steps of obedience. 

My path is Guatemala... yours is probably different. God needs people to stand all over. When your world is broken, change the equation.

Break good. Find your element. Pursue it with passion.